The reason men lack the confidence to approach women is because of rejection and looking bad. There is no other reason more powerful that. As you read this, ask yourself to come up with a reason more pronounced than your desire to look good or your avoidance of looking bad. I can assure you that there is nothing you can come up with. If so, please leave a comment.
But this is a powerful way to thinking because you realize that the thought of looking bad is nothing more than a feeling. Better than that, it is not real. The feeling itself is not a real threat. It’s not as if somebody with a knife is about to hurt you. This is a self imposed feeling that you can simply suppress with more positive actions.
One of the better positive thoughts to have is remembering that when you are about to approach a woman, remember that your nerves are focused on not looking bad. Instead of worry about looking bad, focus on being you. Only two people can judge whether you were looking good or bad when you approach her. The beauty about judgement is it’s a one sided perspective. You could view your approach differently. But there are so many reasons a woman can reject a man or be cooled off by a man, the only thing you can do is be yourself. If you focus on that paradigm, learning how to approach a girl becomes less challenging. You then begin focusing on being real, authentic, and yourself versus something that you’re not.
Don’t get me wrong, techniques that you originally did not adopt are important, but you learn to incorporate them into your being and who you are versus trying to force everything.
You ever hear the saying, get enough at bats and you’ll eventually get hit. Guess what happen if you choose not to approach any women? You don’t get any hits, period. The fundamental problem men deal with is not really how effective their game is. Studies show that 70% of the problem is just taking the act to show up and swing. Yes, it’s OK to be concerned what the outcome may be but without doing it you will never know.
So here I would like to give a little bit of a pep talk in approaching women. Yes, it is great to have a few one liners in your back pocket. It is also nice to have some information on the environment and things you may bring up in conversation. But after you have all of that stuff, if you don’t in fact use it what is the point. This is called courage, stepping up to the plate. All that other stuff can give you more confidence, but without it many men still approach girls not caring. They don’t care about rejection. They are less focused on themselves and more focused on the girl. More focused on getting to know her, a sincere interest that cannot be denied once the courageous man walks up to the girl. She can at that moment sense it…or maybe she can’t. The point is he did it.
If you can take on more of this mind set, you will see your creativity, confidence, and game sky rocket. This is the key guys. I’m telling you, you may be a little scared and nervous at first. But courage is like a muscle, you have to continue working it in order to feel better about taking chances. I hope you take this advice into account the next time you choose to approach a girl.
Guys are always looking for ways to approach girls the right way. It can be a huge challenge for guys because women can be funny and men are always looking for the perfect way to do certain things. Now, I can’t give you the perfect way but I can share with you the most effective methods I have learned over the years that has gotten me tons of dates and relationships with beautiful women out there.
What is the best way to approach a girl? In my approach there are couple of good ways to approach a girl. The first way is to have a couple lines handy to open her up a bit. One good line is “I saw you over here and wanted to say hello.” Another one is “You caught my eye and I just wanted to introduce myself.” I can assure you gentlemen, keeping it simple as this not only shows confidence, it keep it easy for you to remember what to say when you approach her. Women like brevity in these situations. It shows strength and power.
Can I approach a girl with a group of my guy friends? You are more than welcome to do this but I caution you that some women will be turned off by it. It could suggest that you do not have the confidence to walk up to her by yourself but instead you have to have a friend or to do it. Some other women will be OK with it because some just don’t care. So overall I don’t think it matters all that much.
Does it make sense to approach a girl when she’s with her friends? This can be a tough one. You gotta have some confidence to do this. But if you’re up to, it is probably the best way to approach a girl and to make a girl like you. Why you may ask? Because girls like to be picked out of a group of her girlfriends and be wanted. It also shows a certain level of confidence that most men out there won’t necessarily have. This can really set you apart from the other guys, but you need a few tactics to accomplish this one well.
What are a few good lines to bring up when I walk up to a girl? I sort talk about it elsewhere in this article, but here are a few others. “Have you come here before, I thought you may have.” Another is “I love the shirt you’re wearing.” Some other confidence is also a good pick up line. I have an article on my blog related to just good pick up lines.
Is it OK to buy a girl a drink as a way to get in good with her? I always tell guys that this is a no and to not do this. Unless you are going on a date with a girl, this is what I call a sucker move. You need to learn how to utilize your own asset and capabilities in attracting women, not thinking you have to buy her a drink in order to garner her attention.
I hope this post has been of good use to you. I have a lot of good stuff on my blog including articles, reviews of products I have purchased that allowed me to step my game up, and tons of good information. Please feel free to peruse and also read up on my story.
So I bet you’ve heard this one before, but maybe I can say it a little more differently so you can learn how to approach a girl. Try to visualize the woman as a friend that you’re just catching up with and you lost touch with her. You haven’t seen her in a long time, say since high school. And finally you see her in a bar several years later and you’re happy/excited to see her. Just imagine she’s that old friend or someone you haven’t seen in a while and you just want to go up to her a catch up like old times. That’s a good place to be in because it does three things (and more that I won’t go too deep into): first it gives you a powerful mentality to be in when it comes to approaching women; two it gives you a sense of confidence and takes the attention off yourself; and three it allows you to be with her and her presence and less yours.
So next time you’re out, try this tip and see how to works. Again, think of her as an old friend or some girl you haven’t seen in a while. It will give you better presence and more confidence and you won’t have to think about what you say as much as well.